No Service..Truth or Trust?

Food for Thought I wonder how many hands would go up if I asked, How many of ya'll check yo mans phone at least once maybe even every chance you get .For some of you probably all the time but rarely only a few might of had the mere thought of going through it to feed that little voice in your head. You know the one that will wake you up if his phone should so much as beep while the both of you are asleep. The one that has you up saying "Umm is it 2am in this nigga over here checking his text messages? Who the hell is that?" Which probably started the spark that has now become a seed of uncertainty. Nowadays you could really learn a lot and I mean a lot by what is in some ones iphone or blackberry. For instance whenever your dude phone rings or beeps does your eyebrows raise with intense curiosity as to who it might be especially if its after 9pm? Do you know the different ring tone or alerts for his phone? I don't care how secure you probably think you are but sometimes a women's intuition will steer you right. I'm sure its been thought about at least once. In for you ladies who never acted upon this crazy impulse I commend your strong will power cause I sure am one of the ladies raising my hand right now. No one I know likes to be lied to or made a fool of. So I'll give you my take on Truth or Trust when it comes to your mans phone. Just don't do it!!
I use to think I'd find all the answers I needed there. That's cause one day I made one of the dumbest mistakes a girl could ever make and read his messages. I don't know when or why I felt the urge to know what mysteries lurked in there. Could've been because he stayed on it or the nonstop ringing but mainly maybe because he guarded it with his life. Whatever the case was, one night I was caught off guard and was hot when some broad was on the line talking about she was his girlfriend..Umm pause say what!? I then had to know what was going on. Immediately I was hooked. I was now what you called a phone bandit sneaking around late at night to take a peek at who my dude was talking to every minute of the day, getting funky ass attitudes when it did ring or beep cause I really needed to know who he was texting and talking to better yet who was hitting him up and why. I started off by just checking messages and trying to guess the voice mail password then calling numbers not stored in his phone with my number blocked to see if a girl was gonna answer. So yes if you were one of the broads he was being friendly with back then 9 out of 10 it probably was me calling in hanging up in your faces.. lol.. so sad but so true. Truth be told there are so many others out there like me who once did this so I'm glad to know I'm not as crazy as I thought I was. I would do retarded shit like wait until he'd use the restroom or took a shower in begin my search. You probably would think I was a little Mc Guvyer do the drastic measures I would take like waiting up until he fell asleep in army crawling around the side of the bed heart beating so fast, praying he didn't wake up in see what I was doing. Especially wit not one clue of what I'd say if he woke up at 3 in the morning and I'm layin on the floor crawling around like a damn fool. For those who know me I'm pretty sure your picturing this dying laughing cause you know I really did this shit . Sitting back now I laugh at how ridiculous I must have look doing all kinds of sneaky ass James Bond moves,such as cracking codes, hiding in the closets so I could go through the messages in call logs breaking my neck to check in see what he was doing. Yeah real thirsty I know ya'll so please don't judge me. The shit some women do for they niggas I swear they had to be crazy in love ..or maybe just being young and dumb even though there are a few of ya'll old ones out there to. This was all because I built up an insecurity within myself cause of a damn phone. They say seek and you shall find and in some cases I did only to hurt my own feelings when I'd find either a basic conversation down to even a random naked picture of some lame ass ratchet broad. Of course I'd blow my cover once I'd find anything and an argument would soon surely follow once I confronted him. I would get the "Why you going through my phone speech in how disrespectful is that". Though he had a valid point didn't justify it. Ladies that will be there excuse. See I set myself up, since I made the decision to go through his business only to turn around in still stay in the end. Despite my findings on what I would say was incriminating evidence much to my surprise I only drove myself crazy and became paranoid bringing out an obsession that was very unhealthy. Even if he was doing nothing I still needed to validate my reason on looking, Always having to seek out what I thought was the truth. I allowed this crazy paranoia through the course of my relationship to be dictated by his stupid ass phone. When instead of just communicating with him and sitting down and talking to him about what I was feeling. Yes men will be men but as women we tend to live in denial sometimes about some of the shit we put up with. We tend to build are own insecurity and become so paranoid that we don't even care to notice what we're doing with are own confidence which is putting it in the hands of someone else. That we're much like them and in ways we are disrespecting them by invading their privacy especially when we find nothing. I use to be a strong advocate on going through a mans phone. I was so good at it my home girls would call in ask how could they too break the codes on the phones or check call logs without even having his phone in hand. I would create excuses within myself such as; it gives me a piece of mind and his business is my business cause we live together. When in fact its not! That's that mans business if he decides to give out his number or do anything in his phone that could possibly break are relationship even if its in your name its still his business. Why set yourself up for sabotage if it was meant for you to know you will. Don't add to the drama that he may be producing. We sometimes live on learning the hard way rather then just asking when something's bothering us and dealing with it. If you have to check up on your man like a kid then maybe you don't need to be in a relationship with him. We should all know by now a man is not perfect they cease to exist. We need to build on trust instead of finding reasons not to trust. Communication is the key to a healthy relationship with out talking how will you know your man and how can you trust him if you don't know who he is as a person? I love this quote "How will you know what you don't know", it simple if you don't go through his shit you won't know. Not saying play blind if you know the truth, bring it up,work it out and move on. Don't go searching when the signs are there already. My older home girls had to tell me all the time. So I'm now sharing my experience with you all through this blog. Build your trust and if he makes a mistake in breaks it,know he is only human. So you then should try to build with the broken pieces if you can or if its worth saving. I don't condone the snooping at this point nor am I justifying wrongness on a mans part by saying not to check his phone. I'm simply saying it'll only further confuse things and will have your mind playing tricks on you most of the time. In today society with all the temptations around and available social networks as outlets to meet new people. The phone has now become not your only problem if it is one you'll have to check everything. After the phone next it'll will be the emails ,twitter, facebook etc. Then you'll become so involved with this it can turn into an obsession. Leaving you no time to have a life of your own cause your to caught up in his. So you have to have faith in your man to do the right thing. We all know its hard to trust someone especially if they let you down before. But like my momma always said "What you do in the dark will surely come to light". So let the truth seek you and you become the bigger person and leave that damn phone alone. You'll know if its meant to be or if its time to move on.